--- title: "The Freelancer's Trap: Overeating Social Media" url: 'https://stevenjaycohen.com/journal/the-freelancers-trap-overeating-social-media' markdown: 'https://stevenjaycohen.com/journal/the-freelancers-trap-overeating-social-media.md' date: '2018-11-19' description: 'I’ve taken a few stretches of time away from Social Media, a detox of sorts. I’ve been reminding myself that I don’t need to be constantly connected, that allowing for silence can, in fact, aid creativity. But, being self-employed and working in media, a large part of my workday requires me to be o…' taxonomy: category: - Journal tag: - 'Social Media Detox' --- # The Freelancer's Trap: Overeating Social Media ## [The Freelancer's Trap: Overeating Social Media](https://stevenjaycohen.com/journal/the-freelancers-trap-overeating-social-media) 19th Nov 2018 [Social Media Detox](https://stevenjaycohen.com/tag:Social%20Media%20Detox#body-wrapper) ![](https://stevenjaycohen.com/user/pages/files/2018/11/wsi-imageoptim-social-media-overload.jpg)I’ve taken a few stretches of time away from Social Media, a detox of sorts. I’ve been reminding myself that I don’t need to be constantly connected, that allowing for silence can, in fact, aid creativity. But, being self-employed and working in media, a large part of my workday requires me to be online using the very platforms that I try to avoid for my health and wellbeing. When I take a break, I miss the people but not the platform. Does that make sense? In truth, I don’t actually mind the platform, but now that I’ve learned a lot about what goes on behind the scenes at social media companies, I find the whole thing a bit creepy. It’s like there’s this big party and all of my friends are there, but it’s being held at [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s house. [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) is this odd guy and he is more than a bit of a control freak. And, I always feel like I need to check to see if I still have my wallet and my watch after I have spent any time with him. People have complained to [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) saying that some of the people that he let’s into the party make the rest of us feel unsafe. [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) says that he’s sorry and that he’ll do better in the future, but nothing ever changes. When confronted with this lack of action, [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) has gone as far as defending people that he let’s into the party that shout hate speech at the rest of us. Instead of explaining to them that their actions are making many people at the party uncomfortable, [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) explains that those people have the right to their opinion. Those of us watching closely see that the hateful hordes are paying [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) handsomely for the opportunity to stand next to us while they spew hate and lies. [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) calls this “Free Speech,” but since he’s pocketing all of that cash, it doesn’t look “free” from where we are all standing. Still, the party is at [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s house. If we want to be at the party, we need to put up with [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s rules. As a modern freelancer, I am stuck. My clients and colleagues are literally spread across the globe (from Tel Aviv, to Novi Sad, to London, to New York, to Chicago, to Los Angeles, to Tokyo, to Sydney). And, for the most part, I can catch up with all of them at [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s house. When I stay away from [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s house for too long, I miss too many things; too many opportunities have come and gone. So, unlike a recovered alcoholic, I cannot afford to count the days, weeks, months, or years since my last visit to [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s house. Instead, it becomes more akin to someone living with a food addiction, where in order to continue to live, I need to continue to consume the content that is offered through [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck). Oddly, this shifting of the problem back onto myself makes it a bit easier to deal with. There is nothing wrong with [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s stated mission: *[“To give people the power to build community and bring the world closer together.”](https://www.theverge.com/2017/6/22/15855202/facebook-ceo-mark-zuckerberg-new-mission-statement-groups)* In fact, it’s actually admirable. I just wish that [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) were going about it in a less [Machiavellian manner](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the_end_justifies_the_means). If I think of [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) as the guy who conveniently “forgets” that I am trying to lose weight and shoves plates of food at me at his parties (while also “forgetting” to mention that for every plate of food he hands out he makes $X), then he becomes a wholly different type of jerk. [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) has already made his parties useless to the hordes of partygoers who show up to share their latest business achievements. As of 2018, **[only 12 out of every 1,000 people that follow a business (that’s 1.2%) ever see anything that a business posts organically](https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/322007).** So, that self-promotional behavior is a waste of time no matter how often [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) posts reminders into my account asking me to pay for ad views. The real value for freelancers is not in paying [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) for ads, but in participating in conversations in forums at his house (on his site) connected to our varied fields of expertise. Once we make those connections, we should link to our real websites (not our pages within [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s site) and take the professional conversations elsewhere. Be forewarned that [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) will do everything in his power to keep us on his site, but don’t fall for it. Show up at the party. Be seen. Have genuine interactions with real people. Schedule a time to connect off-site. Head back to the real world. Leave [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) behind. Take a walk. Enjoy the sunshine. Just be aware that [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck) trafficks in addiction. He does so unabashedly. He doesn’t need to. There are other ways to achieve his goals. So, until a government entity steps in and breaks up [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck)‘s parties (maybe into a bunch of smaller parties?), we need to be conscious and present whenever we choose to interact with [Mark](https://www.facebook.com/zuck). He doesn’t have our best interests at heart. So, we need to do that for each other. 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